Posted by: ladykyle | February 27, 2011

Want a good laugh?

Just a few days ago my sister sent me an email entitled:

“Have I told you that I can’t have dairy anymore?? (sinuses!)”

and the body of the email included this:

Perhaps this is a good non dairy alternative?
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-12569011

Ok…pause…click the link…I dare you.

If you haven’t clicked, I’ll clue you in.  It’s about women in London donating their BREAST MILK to be churned into ice cream.  UH…say what?  Yep, breastmilk ice cream.  DISGUSTING.

Here’s where the laugh comes in…my sister also posted this link to her facebook and when I saw it my sparkling wit kicked in and I responded with:

you, my sister, take gross to a new level. but i love the creativity. do you think people use this as income?? I have been looking for a third job…
JUST KIDDING!!!

BUT THEN…I was telling the girl I teach with about this horrible idea and it struck me.  SO I immediately emailed my sister…I think we’re onto something HUGE here.  And yes, I know this is outrageous, but I was laughing so hard I was crying…try not to giggle when you read this…I dare you.

ok seriously i was just telling ms elyse about this and i came up with something brilliant
this could be a new DIET.
think about how many extra points nursing women get on WW….
you’re burning more calories cause you’re producing milk. it’s genius. Make money producing milk while losing weight making it!! HOW CAN THIS FAIL?!? You should market it…we could call it something like:

“The Boobie Diet”
“Skinny Tits”
“Chug my Jugs”
“Fit Funbags”

we could even have some sort of tagline…. “heave those hefty hooters” or “Get a bang up body with our brill breasts”

Oh man i am on to something. Happy weekend!!

I don’t doubt that reading these emails betwixt two brilliant sisters has made you realize a) we are seriously on the cusp of becoming millionaire entrepreneurs or b) you wish you had a sister like us.

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Posted by: ladykyle | February 26, 2011

Hey you!

my sister sent this to me and i have been just loving it.  can we all agree to this?  wouldn’t life be so much happier?

happy weekend!

Posted by: ladykyle | February 26, 2011

Sweet words

Love is a temporary madness; it erupts like volcanoes and then
subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have
to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is
inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is.
Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the
promulgation of eternal passion. That is just being in love, which any
fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has
burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Those
that truly love have roots that grow towards each other underground,
and when all the pretty blossoms have fallen from their branches, they
find that they are one tree and not two.
Louis de Bernieres

 

Posted by: ladykyle | February 26, 2011

Love!

As February comes to a close and I find myself distancing myself from the not-so-great something (yet totally enjoyable and lots of make-out fun) I had going on with a goy (I should mention I have decided this is my new word with my sister…I’m really bad at making decisions and once I couldn’t decide between boy and guy and my wise little fingers chose goy…thus a new word was created in my ever growing vocabulary), I have allowed myself to reflect on it a little.  As many girls I am apt to say, “oh he’s such an asshole.  I’m over it.”  And then another part of me says, “I was the crazy one and I still like him and oh I wish he would still call me…I’d probably still make out with him.” (Should I be admitting this? I don’t know…nor do I care)  Alas, I have realized that love in its many forms, whether it be like, like-like, true-love, or just love of a snog, is a freaking weird/hard thing to figure out.

AND THEN

I saw this website

The Man’s Guide To Love

and realized that as tough as it feels for me to be weeding through all this crap, it’s pretty hard for those goys out there too.  And I like that there is a website about it.  Lord knows we have enough girl’s guides to finding mr right now, mr cute arm candy, mr let me do whatever i want, mr rich husband, or just mr right (not that these have worked for me…as I lay in bed alone at 9:45 on a Friday night with an empty left ring finger) but let’s help the guys out too.  I’m trying to step out of myself and allow for the concession that goys have it tough (possibly tougher?) than we girls in some love circumstances.

So love is hard/weird/ugly/fun/joy…all those and more and some of these men know it.

I haven’t watched all of them (give me a break, it’s been going on since March 2010 and I just found it tonight…but WHY did I not find it sooner?!) but I kinda adore this man.  And he’s sweet cause he’s speaking French…slowly enough for me to understand too!!

 

Hope your February was happy and lovely and wonderful.  🙂

Posted by: ladykyle | February 5, 2011

Linkalicious

Ok, my absence from this blog business has left me with a lot to say.  I’m not sure that anyone is even reading this but I will share to my hearts content.

Here are some links for what is a very rainy Saturday in Jacksonville.

These adorable wedding photos make me want to chop my hair off again.

Awesome = this (and on a side note, if you’re not checking out this website or following him on twitter…you should)

I am constantly inspired and moved by this blog.  And it makes me want to take more pictures.  Cause she has pictures of literally every moment.

Check out this website about my sweet little Charlie.  Get educated about Hemophilia and feel grateful for your small blessings.

Ok, and on a lighter note…
I kinda love this video. As a girl who is way too into pop music, this makes me feel a little more sophisticated about listening to it. It’s actually a really cool version and you should check out his other stuff.

Posted by: ladykyle | February 5, 2011

Oh, hello 2011!

So here it is…2011…and the 2010 commitment to this blogging thing I swore to myself I would make has flagged.  But, here’s the thing…I am always thinking about things (let’s hope) that I should blog because let’s be honest…I think I’m the funniest person I know and if it’s making me laugh…well then it will probably make you laugh too.  There’s lots to share…so…shall we?

First I have to start with by acknowledging the title of this blog…once again…because I clearly can’t make a decision to save my soul.  I wanted it to be more like all the encouragement and pep talks I share with my sister (because–allow me to toot my own horn for a moment here–I write some pretty damn good pump-you-up/you’re-beautiful/amazing emails).  Now I just want to share all the funny and outrageous moments of my life.  Sound good?

Alright, let’s shake off that uncomfortable getting back into it thing and go for it.

It’s February (and it still feels awkward to include that silent R) and every single blog I read is just brimming over with love quotes, adorable photo shoots, doily craft ideas, and the general hullabaloo that goes along with Valentine’s day.  I, alas, do NOT have a Valentine and while I’m not opposed to having one, or the idea of being loving in general, I’m kinda just irritated by this holiday.  I know, I know, way to be a total single girl stereotype.  Sorry, but that’s just the way it goes.  I am just highly annoyed by the disgusting commercials for the chain jewelry stores and have commented on several occasions (to my roommate, although I could be talking to myself…) that if someone gave me that piece of shit I would be less than pleased.  (I should mention that I will henceforth be using the occasional swear word and having a “snarky” attitude…judge me if you must…agree if you like).

Sooooo…in lieu of going for the lovey-dovey, swoon worthy Valentine February (again…that R…awkward…can we just start pronouncing it?) on Feb. 1st, I decided to give up dessert.  For the month.  I was going to be awesome and healthy and even had a sweet alliteration for it…Fabulous Fat-Free Fitness February.  I talked it up all day…and then…that night…I ate dessert.  I mean, there was ice cream in the freezer, a salted caramel in my bag, cookies on the counter…what was a girl to do??  After I succumbed to the sweet sweet bliss of (sugar-free frozen yogurt) moose tracks, I made a decision.  I’m cute, single, and too young to restrict myself…okay no that wasn’t it.  But I did decide the whole “no dessert” thing was stupid.

Since the dessert take-back I have proceeded to eat dessert with every meal…yes I mean every….what? You don’t eat dessert with breakfast?  I find a handful of pretzel M&Ms to be perfectly appropriate.  I have just polished off a PARTY sized bag of said M&Ms and have another waiting on the shelf in the pantry.  Oh go on and judge me now…I can handle it.  I’m right there with you.

So it seems that there’s been a turn around…maybe my nasty ‘tude (or as I have taught my 3 yr olds at school “badditudes”) about the holiday of love came from the withdrawl I was going through during those tenuous 6 hours with no sugar…or maybe I just decided I should shut up and go with it.  Either way, I will admit…I’m on board.  Let’s do this love thing.

Posted by: ladykyle | August 17, 2010

Deliquent to the nth degree

To say that my blogging habits are not up to par is an understatement.  With this acknowledgement, I must say…my thoughts on what the purpose of this blog is are all over the place.  I am without a doubt indecisive.

My thought for today is to share one of my most favorite games ever.  Sometimes, I like to play this game with myself and most of the time I play it while at work.  In any given situation, there is an opportunity for awkwardness.  Most people don’t like awkwardness, but somehow I have really learned to cultivate and appreciate the awkward in my life…because there’s a lot.  In view of my love of the awk (have I mentioned I love abbreviations too?) here’s the game.

I like to think of the most awkward thing to do in whatever environment I happen to be in.  For instance, my favorite example I use to explain the game to my coworkers is this:

As a customer is being checked out at the register, most of the time there is a moment of uncomfortable silence as the purchaser waits while the cashier de-sensors, rings up, wraps, and bags the items being purchased.  Some cashiers are lovely and friendly and will happily make conversation with the customer throughout this process.  Most shoppers are happy to accommodate and engage in some brainless banter pertaining to the weather, the start of school, or the plethora of coupons being hurled at them. BUT this happy scenario does not always play out with such ease.  This is where the game comes to play.  The silence can be filled with something entirely awkward.  I do impose one rule: While it MUST be awkward, it’s always better if it is NOT inappropriate.  To rupture the uncomfortable silence, my favorite little gem is for the cashier to nonchalantly say “Oh excuse me, I just passed gas,” while continuing to casually wrap and ring.  This is the best because one, it’s awkward for the cashier to say that, and two, how AWKWARD would you feel if you were the customer?!?  I know I would turn bright red.

With quite the long winded explaination, I should say all that is said to share this….

I’m at Panera using the internet (but…hang on now….I’m probably going to start paying for my own internet service soon…get ready to be inundated with blog entries…does anyone even read this?) and there is a TOTAL cutie sitting two tables away from me.  We are both very sophisticated and cool, typing away on our little Mac laptops and while I may be stealing glances at him…he is more concerned with whatever business it is that he is working on to give my beauty the full attention is it due.  As I am apt to do, I was sitting so gracefully at the table wondering how I might garner a little of his attention and then it hit me.  AWKWARD Panera moment winner.  I have absolutely NO doubt that if I were to say turn on the photobooth application on my computer


(you know the one you take your own pictures and you can see them on the screen) and use it NOT to take photos of myself while alone at Panera but rather use the “reflection” if you will, to take advantage of the lovely natural lighting in Panera and pluck those pesky whiskers that have been popping up on my chin.  (Not that I have whiskers on my chin…this is purely hypothetical and for the greater good of causing an awkward moment)  I’m pretty sure I could glean a glance or two from said cutie a few tables away.

Posted by: ladykyle | July 21, 2010

The Story of Spanky

Today, July 20th, my sweet little puppy of almost 15 years was lovingly put to sleep.  He was a good old dog but old being the key phrase here, it really was his time.  He had cataracts, two different growths on his back and legs, dimentia, and according to the vet, quite the case of OCD.  These maladies make life all the more difficult as a 98 year old (dog years people) pup.

My dad dug him a hole and he and my mother laid Spanky to rest in the backyard.  Mom made sure he was not in any pain when the IV was put in and spent some time with him before they buried him.  Mom and Spanky were closer than the rest of us.  I have cried about his death but more so, I cry for my mom’s broken little heart.

Spanky put up with all sorts of torment including being carried around in a book bag, being dressed in baby clothes, and being spun around on the kitchen floor so fast it would make you want to vomit.  He was a sweet little guy who always wanted to be close and never held it against you if you wrongly took your anger out on him.  His bark usually started with a little rumble in his throat and he could have been in the circus the way he could sit on his hind legs with his paws in the air for longer than anyone thought possible.

Spanky is the reason I love dogs and was my one and only pet.  (Bob and Becky Guppy from 4th grade do not count.)  We brought him into our family when I was in the 6th grade and still petrified of dogs.  As my mom placed him on my lap the night he came home, I, as usual, was so nervous and freaked out, ran to the bathroom sick to my stomach.  A few weeks later and it was all my mom could do to get me to put him down.

I was so lucky to have him and will miss his sweet, soft ears and the tinkle of his collar when I go to see my parents next.

Spanks,

You’re the best.

Love,

Kyle

Posted by: ladykyle | March 26, 2010

Oh Needtobreathe…

My most recent concert adventure was a pretty fantastic one.  Just a few blocks from the bungalow, Freebird Cafe was host to Needtobreathe last week.  I was in attendance and as soon as they started singing was awestruck.  I love music in general, and love a good concert, but this was one of those that I just didn’t want to end!  They were really phenomenal and not only did they put on a good show, they sounded incredible live.  My most favorite moment of the night was the very last song.  Washed by the Water.  So amazing.  Check it out below.  And I should mention I am pretty pumped how great it turned out considering I just filmed with my iphone.  Just goes to show how truly amazing these guys were!

Posted by: ladykyle | March 26, 2010

Coming home

Who wouldn’t be happy to come home to one of these?!  Love them!!

If you know me at all, you know I love purple.  But I will say, the yellow is tugging my heart strings…who wouldn’t have a smile on their face to walk into a house with a cheery door?!

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